Pakora Gone Bad

This is what’s not for dinner.

No I don’t mean that the pakora have taken to a life of crime in the streets of Mombai (formerly Bombay). I’m talking about a recipe that I thought was going to win me a spot on some cooking show gone wrong. So very, very wrong. I found it in The New York Times. A beautiful shot of pakora made with summer corn accompanied by a mango salsa. Genius. The pakora were perfectly shaped. The mango salsa glistening in chunky goodness. How hard could this possible be I think to myself?

So I run of to the store to find tamarind and chick pea flour. No these are not staples in my pantry. Needless to say you aren’t going to find these items on the shelf of just any grocery. Expect if you have a Wegmans in your neighborhood. The store that carries everything. I would hazard a guess that I could purchase a sous chef to help me prepare my pakora if I so desired. Wegmans is all about customer service.

After going to three stores, buying chick peas thinking I’m going to make my own flour (what was I thinking? seriously?! who does that? okay there are those who do. I’m just not that person) I find chick pea flour at New Seasons and still have not found the elusive tamarind juice. Not even a tamarind which I would then juice once I finished making the chick pea flour. At this point I’m ready to trash the whole idea and get some cheese whiz and crackers. But I persevere.

There I am cutting corn off cobs. Mixing all the ingredients. Chickpea flour, corn meal, scallions. Shaping them into little patties with two spoon as instructed in The NY Times. I’m feeling all fab and culinary. Then I go to cook said pakora. That’s when everything goes pear shaped and I end up with these little charred, burnt, smooshy in the middle nuggets of definitely not goodness. Remember when you were small and you ate sand. Try and relive that memory. That’s what it was like biting into the pakora. Bitterly disappointed I tried cooking another batch. Cooking another batch did nothing to make them taste any better. You need to know when to give it up and toss the pakora mix in the trash.

Until next time…Moose out.

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